Where's the Cord?

Here's just one of the reasons I am terrified of electronics: there are too many cords. Especially with computers -- cords (or a wireless connection which I think still has a cord somewhere) for printers, mouse, etc. If I want to download photos, I have to find the cord that goes between the camera and the computer. Same with my iPod.

I can operate most household electronics; I just can't set them up. In days past you had to connect the television to cable and then set up the VCR and the DVD player. Now people have Blue Ray, which I have no clue what it is except it's the newest generation of a way to watch movies. Some people can set up elaborate stereo systems and surround sound. Not me.

I'm pretty good at figuring out remotes, computer software and recording programs through various electronics. I just need someone whose brain is wired differently than mine to deal with the set up and find the cords.

Don't Forget the Old Days

During a friendly chat last night, a friend of ours was lamenting his unending fear of the dentist. There was a little nervous laughter and then he explained.
"If I sat in his chair as a 6-year old in 1945 and he was roughly 70-years old, that means he went to dental school in the 1800s. How current was he?"

One of my brothers-in-law is a dentist. I wish he didn't live 4 hours away because we all want to go to him.

I'm pretty sure the daughter and the baby have not witnessed laundry run through the ringer and hung on the line to dry. Microwave popcorn is older than the baby. I grew up with plumbing in the house but visits to relatives occasionally involved outhouses. They also involved fun things like swimming in a lake, sitting around a bonfire and actually discussing things. No one had an electronic device plugged in an ear or molded to their palm.

Dentistry is painless and routine to our children. Don't I sound like an oldie?

My childhood/early adulthood dentist was a hip-hopping dude in the 70s. He wore psychedelic shirts and multiple gold chains. He was not patient friendly but he did freely dispense nitrous oxide for fillings. I found out later that he enjoyed hauling a tank of it to parties and enhancing the atmosphere with a mood-altering substance.

In the early or mid 80s, I was with a group of girlfriends celebrating a new job for one of them. He approached our table and he was still wearing his gold chains and a loud shirt. Thankfully, he was not carrying a tank. We did not bite. (or spit.)

Reprogram it, Unplug it or Kick it

In addition to the oldies' conspiracy to make me crazy, all electronics in this home have decided to turn against me as well. One issue or problem, I can handle. A wave of them is too much.

We have a newfangled, highly electronic washing machine which I usually love. The husband and the oldies have recently returned from traveling so there's lots of laundry to be done. The other day it just stopped. Lights were blinking but the door wouldn't open and the cycle wouldn't progress. Like most electronically-challenged people, I stood there punching buttons in frustration. No luck. I asked the husband to look at it. He punched some buttons and then decided he needed to go to the club to ponder it. (He probably wanted advice from his golf and card buddies.) Finally, I moved it out enough that I could crawl atop the sink, reach behind it and unplug it. (Hello Hernia!) Plugging and unplugging is the best option and it worked. All the electronics restarted and now it's working like a dream.

A client mentioned that she could not fax to me. I played with it and punched some buttons. Still no dial tone. So I moved the heavy (and full) file cabinets out from the wall so I could check all the various connections. (Hello Hernia!) I called the phone company. Eventually the mystery was solved. The phone cord had been severed; it looked like someone bit it. Logic tells me it was Gabby but I'm not ruling out the oldies because they will eat anything.

The cable company had to reprogram some of our cable boxes. Thankfully, that one was not my fault. There are still far too many remote controls around but I can work them all.

Now I'm told that I may be having email problems. I'm ready to throw the computer out the window. But, I would have to go pick it up and reprogram it.

I've courted enough hernias this week. I guess I'll just pick up the phone.

Electronics

I can work the TV/DVD/VCR/Cable remote controls. I can meander my way through the computer issues. I can change light bulbs. That's about it.

I bought a wireless pet fence system for the puppy. My friend installed it. There's a keypad on my garage door. My friend installed it. She's cheap labor -- it just costs me a cup of coffee. There's always something broken around here. My dad fixes it. Houseboy handles everything with the lawn and changes the light bulbs I can't reach.

It's embarrassing to be so needy. So, I remind myself that some people need me too.

Technology

I'm not super-smart and I'm not dumb. I'm muddling through the middle.

The mother-in-law often awes me. She's trying to understand her cell phone and its various features. We've had lesson after lesson about how to check voicemail on the cell phone and the home phone. She's almost there! Every electronic gizmo has multiple remotes. She's mastered the ones she needs.

An editorial I read recently went through the changes we've all experienced in the last 20 or so years related to technology. Manual typewriter to electric typewriter to desktop to laptop to Blackberry. Eight-track tapes to cassettes, 45s to albums to CDs, Beta or VHS -- now DVDs and Tivo. Not to mention the Internet.

I have great respect for people who keep learning.