House of Cards

When I was a child, several of my friends used to play that game where you built a structure out of playing cards. Sometimes the house would get pretty tall but it only takes one slip up for it all to come crumbling down.

The oldies were heartbroken when they had to sell their home in Holly Springs, MS. They understood the logic and they were grateful to us but it was hard. From Indiana, the husband coordinated with various repair people, as well as constant conversations with the Realtor. We (along with his brother and sister-in-law) made numerous trips to Mississippi to pack, clean, haul, etc. (I've told you how much stuff she packed into the dungeon. Imagine 30-plus years of stuff in this house. Now double it.)

Still, I was sympathetic to the loss of their home, their town, their beloved neighbors and friends. One of the gifts I bought for the mother-in-law this Christmas was the book, "Home to Holly Springs" by Jan Karon. She never got to read it.

The reason I'm thinking of this today is we are pushing mid-February. About 8 months ago, the oldies took a trip to visit friends and relatives in Mississippi. They returned and requested a family meeting -- never a good sign. They informed us that they had signed a contract to build a house in a new subdivision in Sumrall, MS. (Very close to Hattiesburg, where she was from.)

The Belle was strong willed but the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. The husband went a little crazy. In addition to the financial risks and the lack of a nearby VA facility, his constant argument was this: "It's a house of cards. It's one fall or one car accident or one medical emergency away from complete disaster." Somehow, he managed to convince her that this real estate deal was an extremely bad idea. Somehow, he let her believe it was her decision. Then he got to deal with the builder, more attorneys, etc. and unravel this disastrous deal. Plus, get their money back.

If the deal had proceeded, this is the week the house was supposed to be done.

She did go home to Mississippi. Just not the way she planned.

What They Remember

A friend of mine and her family have been dealing with a health scare. Her mother-in-law had some obstruction in her colon or stomach. I know a much more detailed explanation but I'll leave it at that. This condition, life threatening, required surgery on an 86-year old (or so) woman. Did I mention that she also has a heart condition?

The good news is that she survived the surgery and is now actually thriving again. No one -- even the doctors -- expected this. The bad news is she doesn't remember a lot of the past few weeks. Her family has put endless miles on the cars to visit, consult with the doctors, hold her hand, take care of her dog, take care of her finances, etc. One of her grandchildren calls from Florida every day and asks, "Who visited today?" The answer is always, "No one."

I should be more sympathetic. Instead, I want to put on my t-shirt that says, "Been there; done that."

When we rescued the oldies two years ago, he had just come out of hip surgery and she was going through chemo. Hangdog went immediately to the Ortho rehab hospital. The husband visited twice a day, plus shopped for sweatsuits and other necessities. I visited. The baby visited. I took the mother-in-law to visit and wheeled her around because she was weak. He told us the other day that he was so lonely during that time because no one visited.

Other days, he doesn't remember all of the times he's been in the hospital since they've lived with us.

There's a reason they're good together. He remembers nothing. Her memory is frighteningly sharp.