Advice I Should Have Heeded

Remember when your parents tried to advise you and you spent most of the time trying not to roll your eyes? Have you ever witnessed that glazed look on a teenager's face while you're trying to share the wisdom of your years?

I'm not talking about values and ethics. I'm talking about simple decisions or skills that might make life easier or at least, save some embarrassment.


Get dressed, put on some make-up and be ready to greet the day.
Wrongo. I have my coffee and head for my office. Unless I have an early meeting, I can start writing and lose track of time. Every one from the FedEx delivery person to the man that tunes the piano has seen me in my ratty bathrobe.

Speak only with kindness.
My mouth gets ahead of my brain. I'm working on it. I do not like to be cornered. I tend to lash out.

Pay your bills on time.
I wish I had the money I have spent in late fees and making things current. It's absurd and insane.

Don't tell people too much.
I'm still iffy on this one. I tell people way, way too much. I have been burned. But I have also learned some lessons about trust.

Don't marry too young.
I don't regret the relationship with my first husband. I do regret that we got married before we were formed as adults. Yes, I know many people make it work. I didn't and I hurt a very nice man.

Make your bed.
I do this. I cannot stand to crawl into an unmade bed. But many times, I may not make it until 3:00 PM when I happen to wander back there. On the days you do not make your bed the moment your feet hit the floor, you will have a plumbing crisis or something that will involve plumbers or workers traipsing through your bedroom and you will feel slovenly that your bed is unmade.

Know your path.
I'm Dorothy on the Yellow Brick Road. Sometimes the bricks branch off and you get to make choices. I know my path today but I am open to the branch in the road.

Dog Advice

I'm crazy about dogs. (The husband makes the same comment about me but he leaves off the "about dogs" portion.) I've lost count of how many dogs I've owned and loved. My current big, black dog is a maniac but she brings me great joy.

The baby was home from college last night and he commented that she's become much better behaved. Maybe it's the squirt bottle. Maybe it's because she's only 4 months away from her second birthday. Two-years old seems to be the magic age that Labs settle down a bit.

A friend sent me this. It's not new; you may have read it before but it bears repeating. I wish I could credit the author.

When your carpeting is tracked with mud or you're apologizing to the person who has just experienced a knock 'em down french kiss from your dog, remember this.

If a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle
them gently.

I would add a few more:

A stranger at the door probably needs to see your snarly face.
Someone brushing your hair or massaging your scalp feels good.
When you need attention, throw yourself on someone's lap.
Kissing is more fun with tongues.
A treat a day is mandatory.
If you talk/bark until you're hoarse, you've taken it too far.
Regardless of age, you should have toys.
Some dogs and some people need to be kept on a short leash.
Instincts are good. If you sense danger, you're probably right.
Food left on the counter is fair game.
Your own pillow provides comfort.
Your senses can keep you from peril and guide you to good things.
If you have someone to take care of you, you are luckier than most.

Good Cop/Bad Cop

If I push it, I can keep a secret from my parents for about 24 hours. When anything is bothering me, I am itching to call them. Yet, I know what's in store. Bad Cop will let me cry and complain. (There might be an "I told you so" lecture.) Advice will be plentiful and helpful.

Good Cop will understand that Bad Cop has already taken care of the necessary details. Good Cop gets to hear the daughter and lend an ear. No judgment needed; the cops will discuss it later.

My parents are not angels but they are an amazing unit. I could marry as often as Elizabeth Taylor and never find a union as fitting as theirs.

I called today with a problem. Bad Cop said, "Face it and figure it out." Good Cop said, "Kick 'em." Good advice from both sides.