Advice I Should Have Heeded

Remember when your parents tried to advise you and you spent most of the time trying not to roll your eyes? Have you ever witnessed that glazed look on a teenager's face while you're trying to share the wisdom of your years?

I'm not talking about values and ethics. I'm talking about simple decisions or skills that might make life easier or at least, save some embarrassment.


Get dressed, put on some make-up and be ready to greet the day.
Wrongo. I have my coffee and head for my office. Unless I have an early meeting, I can start writing and lose track of time. Every one from the FedEx delivery person to the man that tunes the piano has seen me in my ratty bathrobe.

Speak only with kindness.
My mouth gets ahead of my brain. I'm working on it. I do not like to be cornered. I tend to lash out.

Pay your bills on time.
I wish I had the money I have spent in late fees and making things current. It's absurd and insane.

Don't tell people too much.
I'm still iffy on this one. I tell people way, way too much. I have been burned. But I have also learned some lessons about trust.

Don't marry too young.
I don't regret the relationship with my first husband. I do regret that we got married before we were formed as adults. Yes, I know many people make it work. I didn't and I hurt a very nice man.

Make your bed.
I do this. I cannot stand to crawl into an unmade bed. But many times, I may not make it until 3:00 PM when I happen to wander back there. On the days you do not make your bed the moment your feet hit the floor, you will have a plumbing crisis or something that will involve plumbers or workers traipsing through your bedroom and you will feel slovenly that your bed is unmade.

Know your path.
I'm Dorothy on the Yellow Brick Road. Sometimes the bricks branch off and you get to make choices. I know my path today but I am open to the branch in the road.

Comings and Goings

The daughter and her boyfriend are in town for the weekend. I'm thrilled and the husband is positively giddy. Fathers and daughters have a magical connection. I respect it. I understand it; I feel the same way about my dad. Then I feel a little sad. My dad and I see a lot of each other because we live in the same town. Big Daddy and the daughter don't have this option right now but they're very good about phone calls and texting. It's not the same as getting a hug from your dad.

All of the extended family will be here tonight. We're honoring the daughter's visit home and having a little salute to the baby as he heads off to college tomorrow. I'm trying to live in the moment and enjoy it instead of preparing for my impending sadness when everyone leaves.

When we remodeled this house, we should've put in a revolving door. Like Dorothy said in The Wizard of Oz, "People come and go so quickly around here." The oldies are always a little jarred by this fact. I don't know when this is going to sink in with them. It could be my parents or a girlfriend who stops by. It could be houseboy. It could be a service person. It could be a work-related meeting. Big Daddy could invite people over for a drink. It could be an impromptu party.

Tonight will be delightful. Tomorrow, I will be a puddle on the floor.