The Man with Three Wives

I love all those cheesy Lifetime movies. My favorite is the one about Betty Broderick. It's called "A Woman Scorned." It's actually two movies and they usually run them back to back.

Some of my other favorites are:

Dead By Sunset with Ken Olin(another true story)
When Husbands Cheat with Patricia Kalember (super cheesy and extremely unrealistic!)
The House of Secrets and Lies with Connie Selleca
A Chance of Snow with JoBeth Williams

There are countless others and I'm pretty sure I've seen them all.

The other night I couldn't sleep so I watched "The Man with Three Wives." Beau Bridges plays a doctor who is married to three women: Joanna Kerns, Pam Dawber and some other woman. The juggling and the deception ultimately kill him. (Sorry to spoil the ending.)

I'm living a different version of this movie. The husband is only married to me but he IS a man with three wives. Many women would have a problem with this but I don't. Many, many people feel free to comment to me that our friendship is unsettling. I don't care and frankly, I don't think either of my wives-in-law care either.

There are legal bonds and there are ethical bonds. These are the mothers of his children. Their safety and well-being is important to him. We all may squabble over different things but like any family, we're a unit. That really hit me full force when I stood in front of the Belle's casket (in Mississippi) crying with my wives-in-law.

The daughter and the baby are better off for this relationship. (Although they probably complain about having too many mothers.) We all try to put them first but the truth is, we also genuinely love each other. There's a reason people get divorced but there's also a reason people get married. I did not marry either of these women but I see why the husband did.

We celebrate many things together ... holidays, graduations, and this week, a funeral for the Belle.

He Travels Too Much

Recently, a girlfriend told me a story about one of her friend's child. They called off a wedding at the 11th hour. I don't know these people but the excuse was that the bride decided the groom's job was too demanding and he traveled too much.

What?!!!!

The husband used to travel a couple of times a month for his job. Although I missed him, I also looked forward to his trips. I like private time. He doesn't travel nearly as much as he used to and that has thrown my life some new curves.

I can't speak for all women but here are some of the things I like to do when the husband travels:


When the baby was little, we would choose movies, take our baths and don pjs. Then we would crawl into bed with a big bowl of popcorn and have a moviefest. Later, we'd make milkshakes.

Slathering deep conditioner on my hair and wrapping it in a plastic shower cap so it can really soak in. (The one time the husband witnessed this ritual, he followed me around saying, "Do you want fries with that?")

Waxing things. Enough said.

Ordering a pizza with only my toppings of choice. Or, choosing shrimp dip and chips as dinner.


The husband left this morning for a golf trip. I did my happy dance. The baby is off at college so our movie night is no longer available. Complete solitude is not at option since the oldies live here too. Still, I might order a pizza, deep condition my hair and see what's on Lifetime.

I hope this bride-to-be had a lot of other issues with her husband-to-be. If it was just his travel schedule, I'm perplexed.

The He-Man Women Haters Club

When the Baby was little, my parents used to babysit a lot. Movies were a great distraction and The Little Rascals was a favorite. Later, the Baby and my dad started fishing trips -- no girls allowed. They still call it the "He-Man Women Haters Club."

I feel the same passion about girl trips. No boys allowed. If they were allowed to join us, someone would want a sandwich; someone would want to discuss the golf game. Someone would change the channel during a great Lifetime movie right when we are ready for the man to get his just reward in the end.

When Big Daddy and I travel together, we have a great time. He gets the remote control and we take care of each other. When I travel without him, I get the remote control and I watch Lifetime to my heart's content.

I'm pretty sure I'll never be invited on the fishing trip.