Indiana in the National News Again

(Photos from MSN.com)



This is Marcus Schrenker, the guy who parachuted out of his plane over Georgia and allegedly staged his own death. Unfortunately for him, he forgot that most dead people don't allow themselves to be photographed while they are retrieving their motorcycle from storage and they don't send emails to a neighbor proclaiming innocence. He has been captured now in Florida and is expected to be charged with a variety of crimes across several states.

(Usually when someone from Indiana makes the national news it is almost guaranteed to be someone who meets the following criteria:

No teeth or very bad teeth;
Obese;
Badly dressed;
Horrible grammar;
Standing in front of a shack, usually with multiple lawn ornaments and a car or two on cement blocks.

The best part in our national portrayal is these people are not criminals. They're witnesses to something horrific whether it's a crime or a natural disaster.)

Talk about a bad couple of days. In addition to the failed attempt to stage his death and disappearance, Schrenker just buried his stepfather and his wife has sued him for divorce, claiming infidelity. He's also questioned and accused of some investment shenanigans that clients and the government both frown on. Just one of these things might send someone reeling but the whole house of cards seems to be collapsing.

He isn't toothless or obese. Until recently he seemed to have it all: a multi-million dollar home, a beautiful wife and three children, fun toys like expensive boats, cars and planes, etc. He doesn't need to witness a disaster -- he's living one.

It's Me and My Six Dogs

The Belle and I used to share stories. I suspect I know more of her premarital history than her sons. These were our girlfriend moments.

Once I was in a domestic situation -- okay, some called it a marriage but I don't remember it that way. I wanted out in a big way.

Beyond the obvious issues of ending a relationship, I had no idea what to do with myself and my dependents. They weren't children; they were dogs. One dog had been with me for years. One I had recently rescued from the Target parking lot. She repaid the favor by having four puppies in my closet.

I don't remember what tipped me over the edge but I do remember that night with great clarity. It was a Friday and the upcoming Monday was a holiday. I couldn't fathom a long weekend. I called on girlfriend support which meant an emergency meeting for a drink after work.

I went to my house. I paced a lot (in between tending to my six dogs.) I gave myself a window to wait for him. I rehearsed what I would say. I threw a few items of clothing in a bag to get me through. When it hit 7:00 P.M., I could wait and pace no longer. I put six dogs in a laundry basket and I left a note.

It's humiliating to remember. I am actually one of those people who has left a "Dear John" letter as I fled. You know where I went.

One of my parents opened the door. They knew I was unhappy but they were not expecting me to show up on their doorstep. One of my favorite quotes is from Robert Frost:

Home is where they have to take you in.

He didn't mention hauling six dogs along.

Know When to Hold 'em

I was pretty broken hearted to learn that the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus were living in the bedroom next door. I like denial so I put off reality as long as I possibly could.

My heart has been broken by more than one boy or man. Some things are not meant to be. Some things don't ring true. I try to learn the lesson.

People act like friendships are the easiest things in the world. They're not. Hi hi, kiss kiss friendships are easy. Actually, that's not friendship. It's being an acquaintance. Friendships involve knowing your faults, knowing your parents and children, knowing the disaster of your financial situation or a marriage on the cusp of disaster. It's not easy. Just like a marriage or any other relationship you've chosen, they require commitment, dedication and a strong dose of faith. It's a choice to fold 'em or hold 'em.

You can't divorce your parents or your children. You can surrender a pet but I truly hope you are not one of those people. You can resign from a client. When it comes to friends, all options are open. I've been way, way too obsessed with my own issues, my oldies and my life that I forgot to look around. I've let some people down.

I'm on a mission to fix it. I choose to hold 'em.

Different Kinds of Loss

Loss hurts. Like most things in life, there are different degrees of pain.

Some examples:

You have a basket with loose socks -- the mates are lost.
You lost an important phone number or document.
You lost a bet.
You lost a job, a client or a significant business deal.
You lost the ability to do something that you had taken for granted.
You lost a spouse through death or divorce.
You lost a friend through death or disagreement.
You lost a parent or two, or in-laws.
You lost a child.

I can't fathom that last one but I know far too many people who have survived it. They are my heroes.

There were times in the last few years that I was certain I had lost my mind.

A License

It's amazing how many things you are supposed to hold a license.

My dog has a license. I have no idea why or what it could possibly be used for.
I've been married more than once. I got a license.
I have a driver's licence. Ok, makes sense.
I did a bartending gig a few months ago; I now have a bartender's license.
I don't have a permit/license to carry a gun (and I do not have a gun) but that's another thing you need to get a license.
My dad has a fishing license.

Here are a few things that I wish you had to obtain a license:

Adopt a pet
Become a parent
Get a divorce
Shoot off fireworks

I could go out tomorrow and I could adopt a pet, shoot off fireworks, buy a gun and have a baby (ok, that's a stretch.) All of my licenses are in order.

Shock Proof

There's a difference between legitimate shock or just being jumpy. I'm extremely jumpy but very little shocks me anymore.

People get divorced. It's sad but it no longer shocks me.

XXXX number of people were killed in the Middle East today. It no longer shocks me.

Some politician (local, national, international) has done something corrupt. It no longer shocks me.

Teenagers push the limit, get caught and still do some stupid things. This is not a shock to me.

Marriage is a marvel of good times and bad times. It took me a long time to learn this but it no longer shocks me.

Sometimes people who you think are on your side will throw you under the bus. I forgive. And, I'm never shocked -- just disappointed.

The moment you're flip enough to think all is under control, God has other plans. Doesn't shock me.

The cutest and most animated puppy in the litter will turn out to be the dog that's hardest to train. Doesn't shock me and doesn't stop me.

Jumpy is harder to cure.