Steps

When someone asks if I have children, I say yes. Although I am a stepmother (a term I loathe and avoid,) I choose to focus on the second half of the word. Mothering comes in many forms. It may be a secondary relationship in the eyes of some people but that’s a waste of a lot of love.

Odds are that you will deal with it. Even if you are one of the lucky people who marry for life and raise your biological children, you are not immune. One of those children may date or marry someone with a child. Or, your sibling will show up at the next gathering with a ready-made family.

I was introduced to this concept early. Neither of my parents was raised by their birth mother. One was blessed with a woman who considered it an honor. The other spent his childhood feeling secondary.

If you’re a step-anything, don’t show favoritism to the real children versus the stepchildren. Make a choice to step it up.