Going to Church

I grew up going to church on Sunday. Dr. Charles Ballard is one of the most influential people in my life. He inspired us and he led us. I adored him in my childhood and I adore him now. He's semi-retired but he still fills in for clergy on vacation or whatever. My heart swells to twice its size when I see him standing at the pulpit.

I am Methodist. But I consider myself quasi-Catholic. A lot of the neighborhood was Catholic and I would sometimes go to church with them. I learned the rituals. (Once I went to college, I also liked option of Friday night mass at 5:00 so the rest of your weekend was free.) The priest in my college days was not rigid. He knew I was toying with converting to Catholicism so he allowed me to take Communion and to go to confession. He allowed me to explore my faith.

When my goddaughters were born, I was there. They are Catholic. There was some question about my qualifications as a godmother because I was technically not a practicing Catholic. Again, a nice priest saw the intent and the love. He took a leap of faith. I hope I've lived up to it.

The husband has had some crummy experiences with organized religion. He was raised Catholic, attended parochial schools, etc. When the daughter was an infant, he and his wife wanted her baptized in the Catholic church. The priest in their parish proceeded to bargain with them and would only agree to baptize her if they agreed to attend mass every Sunday. (In my world, that's blackmail.) This did not sit well with Big Daddy and as the story goes, he asked the man to leave their home. He is only willing to step into a Catholic church for the funeral of a friend or a ritual for one of my goddaughters. Even the oldies got a little perturbed with the church and converted to Episcopalian.

I occasionally agree with him. Sometimes organized religion seems about power, money and control. Sometimes it gets a little corrupt. Sometimes it provides hope for the hopeless. Maybe they could find it elsewhere; maybe not.

Yet, I was emphatic that the baby have some religious training. If he's going to turn away from it, I want him to have some basic principles to understand what he's turning away from. He spent many years in church youth groups, attending church-sponsored trips and participating in church activities. He went through confirmation classes and made great friends. He'll stray but there's not a doubt in my mind that when the chips are down, he'll remember the lessons learned.

I belong to a little church. It's filled with people I love. We've changed ministers a few times. Rev. Harry told a story once about a man who commented to him, "I don't need to attend church. I can pray anywhere -- even on the golf course." Rev. Harry responded, "But do you?"

Then we got Dr. Gwen. A little (almost country-like) church and they send us a middle-aged, African American woman. Well, people about fell out of the pews. As my dad used to tell her, she had a little Baptist going in her. She could ratchet it up. Sometimes she broke into song. Often, she broke into to tears. She was the most inspiring and down-to-earth minister I've ever known -- except Uncle Ken. We have a new minister now and I feel guilty that I don't know him very well.

I go to other churches. I have a huge and majestic Methodist church very close to my home. I know many people there and I attend many times a year. They have an offshoot service, held in a local theater. The service is casual and everything is contemporary with live, upbeat music, video clips, etc. I like to attend a few times a year. They have guest speakers so I go to hear my favorites.

Here's what I do know. I love sitting in my church, in the pew beside my parents, with aunts and uncles surrounding. I love greeting fellow parishioners and asking about their families, their health and their lives. I love holding hands with my mother and singing "Shalom (Peace) to You." I love watching my dad as a greeter. I love kneeling at the altar beside my father. I'm not only saying my own prayers: I'm praying that all others will be answered also.

Sometimes I get busy with travel, work, etc. Sometimes I just want to sleep in. I'm not quite as dedicated to regular church-going as I should be but it's still my church. The fellowship is what does it for me.