Big Daddy has three brothers so I have three sisters-in-law. I have more in common with some than others but we all live in different states so it's easy to get along. I adore their children and I'm grateful for the gift of being "Aunt Sheri." I have an ex-sister-in-law (I hate that phrase but I can't find any other way to describe it) and I try to keep in touch with her too.
I have two wives-in-law. In the 70's, George Jones stood at the podium for some music award and said something like this about the love of his life, who had just remarried:
"I'd like to congratulate Tammy Wynette and my new husband-in-law."
My wives-in-law have allowed me to help mold the two best children. Instead of being threatened, they've picked up the phone and said, "What do you think about this? How should we handle it?" They've welcomed me and my input without ugliness. (Ok, a little ugliness here and there but never in front of the children.)
Shortly after the oldies moved here, I was headed out the door for a lunch meeting. She asked me about it and I said, "I'm going to meet my father-in-law." Yes, I am divorced from his son. He is still my father-in-law. Sometimes, Big Daddy and I make a point to go see their other son play in an event. I don't say, "This is my ex-brother-in-law."
It's complicated yet, we don't have to over complicate it. Some marriages ended. Mine, Big Daddy's. We've been there. My love still hangs in there. When the baby was going through the graduation rituals, parties, etc., we adored having time with his maternal grandparents. They send us Christmas cards. They've given us homemade gifts. When the daughter lost her maternal grandmother, we all went to the funeral. We all missed her.
Tonight, my parents are having dinner with my in-laws -- not the oldies, the previous ones. I desperately want to be there, but I won't. I'm so proud that this relationship has survived. I'm thrilled that a marriage that didn't last produced a friendship that did.
3 comments:
Just think about where the world would be today if we all got along like that? Some people just cannot but I know many who feel as you do. I wanted to dislike Don Blackwell when he started going with Marie but now he is one of our good friends. That would have been our loss if I had been hard nosed. Patsy
P.S. When Kim and Eric married I told him if anything happened to their relationship he could not divorce us. I would fight long and hard to keep him in our lives. Love, Patsy
I'm so glad your dad and I didn't have to divorce your very first in-laws. They are wonderful people, and we love the entire family, including your ex-husband's wife and their children. It was fun to catch up with what is going on with all of them. Friendships are a treasure.
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