Someone forgot to give me the rule sheet. Come to think of it, I don't want it.
I've watched people annihilate their spouse with words and a tone of voice they would never use while speaking to their children or their parents. I've done it myself.
I've watched people discipline a pet with words and actions they would never use on a person.
I've seen friends gang up on another friend (from kindergarten to middle-age) and forget that they might be the next target.
I've heard about people who (in a fit of rage) say some pretty hateful things to their children like, "I wish you'd never been born." I don't want to know these people.
We all get to make choices. And yes, I am completely guilty of letting my mouth shoot out of the gate before the logical side of my brain catches up. I get to choose the rules for me and you get to choose yours.
My parents are allowed to say anything to me. They are allowed to be brutally honest. It's a relationship that's built on trust so I don't want the kid-glove treatment. (I've never had it so I would freak out.)
A small circle of friends is allowed to ask or tell me anything. The rule is when we say, "To the grave," we honor it.
The daughter is strong and opinionated. She can tell me what's on her mind and how I could've handled it better. My only caveat is to remind her that she hasn't walked in my shoes.
The husband should be able to discuss everything with me but we have a long habit of getting prickly. Walking out of the room is our universal signal for "this conversation is over."
Society's rules keep changing on me. What used to be taboo is now the norm. I'm not great with change so I'll stick with the morals I'm trying to live up to and the rules I've chosen for myself.
1 comment:
I am grateful we do not have an "across the board" set of rules. As it would be hard to get society to see that my way is the best way, therefore I should be on that committee of Rule Makers. For now, I make my House Rules. Although, I too am preplexed at how some people have No Rules. My cousin moved her family to Canada in the early '90's and she had quite a time with the lax rules for children. They feel that children learn best from experience, and Shari had such a hard time with her kids being the odd man out. However, they turned into wonderful young adults.
I get Sheri's rules, at least we are on the same page! ps You are one of the few allowed to be brutally honest with me too!
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