The husband just left to take Hangdog to the Home. I've tried to keep my emotions out of it but I've spent a fair amount of time hanging out in my office, trying to keep my crying private.
Suddenly, all the little things I used to stress about seem minuscule and somewhat cruel. So what if he wants dessert with every meal? I'm tempted to call the Home and tell them they do not have enough butter.
I haven't transformed completely. I totally lied to him, pretending I was calling his wife. (We are not ready for that discussion.) I left the TIC TAC prescription with the nurses.
We both knelt and said our prayers. I reminded him that this is just one more transition and he has done that repeatedly throughout his life. I suggested that he might make some new friends who haven't heard his stories -- and they're good stories. I promised that we will be there every possible day.
Than I curled up on the dog pillow, called my parents and cried.
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5 comments:
It's tough but you will make it through. Take the advice you gave Mike. This is just another transition. As much as you don't want them at your house the guilt of "deserting them" is overwhelming. It's a normal part of life. When our parents grow old they become children.
If you did not feel guilty, we would all come and have you "put away".
Now it's time for Sheri to focus on Sheri. Take some needed R&R and think about the great things you have to look forward to in life. If you don't have any, quickly make some. Life is too damn short.
You've been caring for everyone else and now they are gone. That is hard. You need to fill your time with other productive things that you used to enjoy. Remember????
It was hard and sad for me to watch Big Daddy drive away with his Father knowing where he was taking him. I'm just your neighbor & friend and know how many tears I've shed since they drove away, so I can only imagine how you feel right now. I know he will be well taken care of and will at some point be a happy camper about the entire thing. He was pretty upbeat about it yesterday once the decision was made, so hopefully his entire attitude will only get better. It is really hard for you all right now but he will be okay. Hopefully his "Honey" will get well enough to joint him, which will be the best thing for him. When my husband's Mother got sick he made the statement which is so true. He said, "We've raised our children so now we get to raise our parents".
Abby is right, you now need to concentrate on Sheri and what makes Sheri happy. Enjoy and laugh about the things that made you crazy the last 2 1/2 years while they were in your home. Enjoy life again and enjoy it to its fullest! Just remember that in about 6 days, we'll be off to the land of tons of sunshine, with lots & lots of R & R, many, many laughs, way too much fun, and we might even go bear hunting (hahaha!).
I love you!
Pammie
Sheri,
I would expect you to feel sad. I'm sad too. I know you love these two people, and you were loving to them. Your complaints came from sheer exhaustion. Hangdog is very lonely without his honey. My hope is that he will make friends and be able to participate in some activities that will help fill his time until they can be together. He knows none of us will abandon him.
Love,
Mom
Sheri, Surprise! I don't want to shock you at this fragile time but yes, I did read your blog and am taking the time to comment. So, pick yourself up from the floor and read. I'm typing this for the second time because I must be too retarded to figure out how this commenting works. I know the saga with the oldies is far from over. However, it is so important and good for you to have your home back. The oldies have a lot of folks who will visit them and love them, they will be fine. Now it is Sheri time. Go find a safe place to relax without the fear of an oldie falling or passing out on your watch. You are one of the strongest women I know. I do know the last few years have taken their toll on you. Let your friends help you find your old true self. I miss my Sheri, the strong, self-confident gal we all love. I know you will get your "kicky" back. I miss you Baby!
Love you very much, your sister Sugar.
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