Monday, March 17, 2008

15 Years of Care Giving

My mother had two sets of parents: her biological parents (crazy Grandma and Wild Bill) and an aunt and uncle (Bobbie and Pa) who raised her and her sisters. Grandma and Bobbie were sisters; Wild Bill and Pa were brothers. This happens more often than you think.

While the husband and his two brothers were at the funeral home making arrangements on Saturday, I was flying home from Florida. I was reminiscing about the last few years -- the good, bad and ugly. My parents picked me up at the airport and we talked about care giving. We shared memories about the oldies. We shared memories about my grandparents.

My mother reminded me of something I had forgotten or chose to block out. She was a caregiver to her four parents for 15 years. I say this tongue in cheek, but she always has and always will outdo me. I resigned myself to it years ago.

I miss Hangdog and the Belle with an ache I cannot describe. I'm grieving so I burst into tears over anything and everything. Then I get angry. Mostly, there's an emptiness.

But I cannot fathom doing it for 15 years.

3 comments:

Sandy said...

We were not all under the same roof for 15 years, so it was a little different than your situation, which I think was more difficult. I'm proud of you for opening your home and your heart to Dan's parents. I think the experience has made you a better person. They hold a special place in all of our hearts.
Love,
Mom

cecily crossman said...

I agree with mom.

janis said...

If you had not opened your home to Eve & Mike, I would never have had the privilege to get to know them. They were amazing, fun and a pain in the butt all wrapped up together. They will be greatly missed.
Eve was the perfect example of a Southern Belle, and I learned a few things from her. I adored that she dotted on her man, and could still bitch about him. She was kicky, and adorable. I will cherish her memory.
Mike was a great story teller, and even though he had so many health problems and was troublesome, I loved to hear him call Eve "Honey Bun" and look so lovingly at her.
I am grateful that you shared them with us. I am also so glad they inspired you to write the Blog.