Door to Door Religion

I'm a little suspicious when the doorbell rings in the middle of the day. Unless I've scheduled an appointment, anyone who has legitimate business here probably has a key.

When the Belle was healthy, she loved to answer the door. Yeah! Someone to share my stories with! She was a charming hostess, whether you were invited or not. I tend to answer the door with a snarly face -- unless you're delivering flowers.

Yesterday I was in the zone. Phone calls returned and a little writing time was needed. I have a deadline looming. So, I dedicated a couple of hours to work on my project. Then the doorbell rang.

I skulk around. Yes, I actually crawl so I can look out various windows to see if I need to answer the door. Plus, I already have an attitude about the interruption.

My uninvited guests were peddling their religion. You can guess which one. Bibles and pamphlets in hand. I grabbed a book of my own and opened the door.

They asked, "May we share the word of our Saviour with you?"

I asked, "How can you read the Bible if you can't read a sign?"

(Our neighborhood has a sign that says: Residents and Guests only.)

One woman was holding the Bible. I was holding the neighborhood directory. And I asked, "Whose guest are you? I would be happy to give them a call." I guess they're not used to cranky writers so they turned and left.

This approach must work for them on some level because they've been doing it for decades. I remember some similar version of this during my childhood. But honestly, does anyone invite them in, smack themselves on the head and say, "Oh my Gosh, I was looking for a new religious affiliation!"